In a Western Australia crocodile park a man wanted to give a five metre saltwater croc a pat.
As you do. They're such attractive, cuddly creatures.
Here he is:
Photo: WA Police/PerthNow
So our hero climbed into the enclosure and sat on its back.
The croc probably thought that if he ate the brainless moron he may get infected so he just took a few chunks out of the idiot's leg.
It might just be the first time anyone's escaped from the jaws of a saltwater crocodile.
Then across to the UK, where two brothers decided to ram-raid a service station shop.
Having smashed their way inside and stolen what they wanted they took their masks off to talk to each other...in full view of the CCTV cameras.