I don't get this either...

I'm still trying to understand Citibank's 'marketing initiative' I posted about yesterday...and here's another in my 'I don't get it' file:

People are paying a lot of money to eat dinner while dangling from a crane fifty metres in the air.

If anyone who's done it reads this...why?

The spin on food hygiene

It's all good news on the food outlet hygiene front if you look at the way the story today is presented.

Gulf News headlines the story: "Hygiene standards improve in food establishments".

The first para tells us that "food establishments in Dubai saw a qualitative improvement in their standards of hygiene last year".

Later it tells us that "the amount of fines fell by 50%" and that "the year 2010 saw saw a significant reduction in the number of violations".

All true according to the report issued by Dubai Municipality.

But if you look at the figures there's another way the story could have been slanted, equally accurate.

There were in 2010 a total of 7,778 violations. While that's better than the 14,188 the previous year it's still a long way from acceptable in my opinion.

Nearly 8,000 hygiene violations by food outlets detected...how many of us does that put at risk?

In fact it's about 20% of the inspections carried out, and that is surely far too high.

We're going in the right direction but there's still a huge amount to be done, not least of which is education in hygiene for those involved in handling our food.

The Gulf News story is here.

"Take away only"

Not being a morning person I try to ease myself gently into each day by making the first port of call a coffee shop, reading the papers and having my caffeine hit.

Not today though.

Ramadan eating/drinking rules are being enforced much more strictly than they were last year.

Last Ramadan the coffee shops in Souk Madinat Jumeirah were all open for business. Like prohibition-era speakeasies they were shuttered off, doors only a tiny bit ajar, customers inside hidden from public view, but they were operating normally.

In Madinat Jumeirah I usually have my coffee in Dome and a couple of days ago they told me that they would operate as last year during Ramadan.

But when we got there this morning they told us 'take away only'.

Dubai Municipality has apparently issued a new directive and are enforcing the no public eating/drinking rule.

Are you having the same problem this year?

Tell me they're kidding

A cheeseburger pizza??!!


This is one I must bring to the attention of the Italian pizza police.

Warning: This post contains pork

Dinner yesterday was the Westin Mina Seyahi buffet, which had something that we've never seen on a Dubai buffet before...

It may be art, but is it food...

In the days when I used to run advertising agencies in the UK and Australia I used to take in design students to give them practical work experience.

They were usually in their first year in art college so they had no practical experience, they were learning the basics and were starting to explore their creativity.

Although what they designed was often pretty it was inevitably completely unworkable and unrealistic with no relevance in the real world.

I was reminded of it the other evening when we made one of our rare trips to a hotel restaurant, the Hunter Room Grill at Westin Mina Seyahi.

It's been a while, a couple of years in fact, since I posted about pretentious food but I couldn't go past this example.

Mrs Seabee ordered what was described on the menu as braised Short Rib with puree sweet potato, mushrooms and onions.

Those first year art college students came to mind because this is what arrived:



This isn't from a first year student but from what must be a qualified and highly paid chef in a five star hotel. Which charged Dh158 for the dish, served on a strange slab of cold china.

The quality of the food wasn't the problem, that was fine. Excellent, well-cooked meat and fresh vegetables. But who came up with that presentation, and why?

Another reminder that we're right not to encourage such nonsense by visiting hotel restaurants very often came a few evenings earlier.

Nowhere near the same pretentious presentation but another example of a menu misnomer.

At Pachanga at Hilton Jumeirah Beach Mrs Seabee (she always orders the wrong thing) ordered Paella, a dish she really enjoys.

As you probably know, paella is a dish which has all its ingredients cooked together in one pot at the same time.

Here's what arrived:



A strangly moulded circular pile of rice with peas artfully arranged on top. Pieces of separately cooked seafood were carefully arranged on top of that stack and other seafood items were dotted around the strange piece of china it was served on.

Again, top quality ingredients, well cooked. But paella it ain't. It's seafood served with rice and peas.

Update on 'service charge' update

Now you and I think it's fairly simple - a law was passed in 2006 saying it's illegal for restaurants to charge a 'service fee'.

Simple, it's illegal so they can't do it. Right?

Wrong.

We don't understand. It obviously isn't simple at all.

In fact from the number of updates and clarifications issued it must be very complicated.

As usual we have different officials in different ministries and departments, federal and emirate, clarifying the issue for us. Naturally, in the way of things here, the've all been different so we now have no idea what's actually happening.

I've tried in my previous three posts in the last week on 'service charges' to keep up with the updates and clarifications.

It's illegal so they have to stop it. Except restaurants and cafes operating inside hotels and those paying taxes to the local governments.

Customers can't refuse to pay the 'service charge'. Yes they can refuse to pay.

A bylaw has to be issued, in about two weeks, before the law can be enforced. Enforcement will happen immediately.

A grace period to allow restaurants to adjust their systems. No grace period will be allowed.

Got that?

By the way, whatever happened to the official government spokespeople? I posted about the announcement that they were being appointed to stop this kind of confusion way back in March last year.

Getting that idea up and running must also be much more complicated than it appears.



Today's clarification is here.

Inevitable confusion

You can guarantee that the more clarifications we're given the more confused the situation will become.

The latest in a long and never-ending line is the restaurant 'service charge' issue.

First, restaurants have been openly charging anything from 5% to 30% 'service charge' even though it has apparently been illegal since 2006.

Many claim they weren't told that it was illegal and I'm sure very few of we paying customers knew that it was.

We're told that although the law is in place it requires a bylaw before it can be enforced.

We're also told that we can't refuse to pay the illegal charge if a restaurant demands it.

Today we have clarification in The National.

The Abu Dhabi Department of Economic Development’s chief lawyer has said that customers should refuse to pay service charges at non-tourist restaurants.

A couple of days ago a senior official at the Dubai Economic Development Department told Gulf News that consumers can't take action and refuse to pay the service charge at any restaurant.

So which is it? Is the law to be applied differently in each emirate?

And how can we be sure the restaurant is 'non-tourist'? The new information is that the ban does not apply to restaurants licensed by the various tourist authorities, which includes most establishments in hotels and private clubs.

A bit vague to say the least.

I don't suppose confusion (relating to almost any subject) could be a deliberate policy could it? To have us throwing up our hands in frustration and putting up with the staus quo?

Surely not?


Today's story from The National is here.

The earlier Gulf News story is here.

The 'service charge' debate

The 'service charge' from many restaurants which we now know is illegal has become the current big talking point around town.

There are two particular comments that I've heard over and over again.

The first is that the restaurants will simply raise their prices. In fact that was the first comment, from Rami, left on my original post on the service charges.

It misses the point in my opinion.

I don't object to paying for my food, I object to the cost being hidden, disguised, misrepresented.

I said in the post: "Generally speaking it's simply a way of charging more for the food than the price shown on the menu and that's dishonest."

Grumpy Goat in response to Rami's comment : "Personally I prefer for the price you see to be the same as the price you pay - and sticking a tiny footer at the bottom of the menu explaining that there's a 15% on-cost is disingenuous at best."

That's exactly the point. The price is shown on the menu as, let's say, Dh50 but in fact the 'service charge' means you pay anything between Dh55 and Dh65.

If that's what you're going to charge for the dish then be honest and say so.

I fully subscribe to the second comment being made; why has this illegal activity been allowed to continue for so long?

The Supreme Committee for Consumer Protection said that under Consumer Protection law 24, 2006, restaurants are not allowed to add any service charge to a bill.

Law 24 of 2006.

We're a couple of days away from 2010.

There's another aspect of this which I don't understand. I quote today's Gulf News report:

A senior official at the Dubai Economic Development Department told Gulf News: "According to the consumer protection law restaurants are not allowed to add service charge to a bill. Once we receive the bylaw we will immediately inform the restaurants to stop this illegal practice which they carried out for more than three years. The bylaw will be issued in a couple of weeks."

A law was passed which can't be enacted until a by-law is issued - which it hasn't been for more than three years.

Any legal experts reading this who can explain that to me?

Another decision I don't understand is this: However, he said restaurants will be given a grace period to adjust their accounting and bill system before implementing the rule.

The length of the grace period wasn't specified.

If it's illegal it's illegal. Adjusting the till can't take more than a few minutes can it?

It sounds like another attempt at ignoring something in the hope that it'll go away. This won't though.



The Gulf News stories start here.

Restaurant 'service charges' illegal

Something I've always disliked is the so-called 'service charge' on restaurant bills.

The assumption has generally been that the 'service charge' goes to the staff as tips but the reality is very different. In a few establishments it does go to the staff. In others only a percentage goes to staff. In yet others the owner simply keeps it.

Generally speaking it's simply a way of charging more for the food than the price shown on the menu and that's dishonest.

The 'service charge' culture has crept in here over the past couple of years but it's now been declared illegal.

The Supreme Committee for Consumer Protection has just held its fourth meeting of the year under the chairmanship of H.E. Sultan Bin Saeed Al Mansouri, Minister of Economy.

WAM reports: "The Committee warned restaurants against the illegal service charges. This followed several complaints received by the Ministry of Economy that some restaurants were charging as much as 5 to 20 per cent of the bill as service charge, which the Committee said is against the consumer protection law number 26 for year 2006. Al Mansouri said that the Ministry will take serious measures against those who violate the law."

Good.

The WAM story is here.

Pub grub

As I've said before after trips to the UK, I think people are wrong to laugh at English cuisine. In my opinion it isn't the cuisine but the way far too many people cook it that's the problem.

We enjoy pubs, the atmosphere and the food, and for our four days in Derbyshire, in the Peak District National Park, we stayed B&B in this one:



They have a big menu and the item that caught my attention was this one:



Here it is - it more than met my expectations:



This went down well too:



For breakfast this was served up:



That sets you up for the day!

Not only is it cooked well, equally importantly they start with top quality ingredients. This is farming country and the meat has a great reputation. An added bonus is that the pub owners have a son who's a local butcher so they get the best of the best.

Suspected food poisoning kills two more children.

A little girl died from food poisoning in Sharjah a couple of weeks ago and now there's another similar tragedy, this time in Dubai.

Two young children have died, food poisoning being the probable cause.

Five year old Nathan and his seven year old sister Chelsea were rushed to hospital by their mother, who was suffering from the same symptoms, after eating a take-away Chinese meal.

Nathan was pronounced dead on arrival, Chelsea was treated in intensive care but couldn't be saved and their mother recovered.

The health authorities are investigating and they know which restaurant the food came from, so I assume we'll soon know what, where, how.

Worldwide, thousands of people die each year from food poisoning, even in the most advanced countries, so it's probably inevitable that we'll have some deaths here. But what a waste of three young lives. Particularly as basic hygiene and correct food handling could prevent it.



Gulf News has the story.

Sharjah's dangerous food

There's an alarming report in The National this morning about the safety of eating out in Sharjah.

It follows the death of little Marwa Faisal, the four year old who tragically died from food poisoning in the emirate a week ago. The rest of her family were seriously affected too, although no source of the problem has yet been announced.

Now Sharjah Municipality reports that of the 1,588 restaurants and cafeterias its inspectors checked last year only 223 met the minimum requirements.

Only 223 out of 1,588. That's astonishing.

Of the 1,365 not meeting minimum requirements, 891 were issued with warnings and 474 were closed temporarily until they improved.

Those really are frightening figures.

The municiplity reports that outlets were guilty of poor maintenance, serving food that had passed its use-by date, black mould on kitchen surfaces, flaking paint falling on to food and staff not observing correct food safety procedures.

At least as bad as those is the practice of turning off refrigerators at night to save power, a common cause of food poisoning, particularly in summer of course. The municipality said they're working to eradicate this practice too.

All of this is total and disgraceful disregard for the health of the public from an incredible 86 percent of the industry.

It goes right down the chain too. In Al Ain last month police and inspectors carried out spot checks on trucks. They found 143 carrying produce to markets and restaurants without proper permits. Over three days they caught 11 trucks that were unfit for the safe transport of food.

The food wasn't being transported at the correct, safe temperature and 437kg had been spoilt, damaged or was below standard for service and sale to the public. But if they hadn't been intercepted it would have been sold to the public I'm sure. And how many more trucks are there ferrying food around unrefrigerated?

The municipalities and the health authorities around the emirates say they're cracking down and various programmes are being put in place to get on top, and stay on top, of the practices.

There's regular talk about draconian jail sentences here for various law breaking activities. I'd like to see them for these practices, which to me are very serious crimes, threatening the health and even the lives of people.



The full story is in The National.

Taxed in tax free Dubai

The outdoor smoking cabin in my last post was next to the restaurant we stopped at for lunch, La Moda at Media City.

What a great setting it is too, in what was empty desert five or six years ago:



Quite amazing I think, and a great location for a leisurely al fresco lunch on a gorgeous winter day.

But.

Inevitably it has the same problem that so many of Dubai's ethnic restaurants have. Apart from Lebanese and Indian that is.

I'm sure the problem is that whatever the cuisine offered the chef and kitchen staff are from the Philippines or India.

La Moda is an 'Italian' restaurant, the menu has Italian dishes but the flavour is anything but Italian.

We had two of our Italian favourites. A Pizza Margherita, the original pizza which is, or should be, basically Italian tomatoes, mozzarella cheese and basil to give the red, white and green of the Italian flag. It should also have some oregano, parsley, onion, garlic, seasoning. We also had Spaghetti Putanesca, one of the tastiest sauces in my opinion with Italian tomatoes, anchovies, black olives, capers, plus of course some olive oil, garlic, seasoning and red pepper flakes.

Incredibly, they'd managed to make both dishes tasteless. The pizza was undercooked while the spaghetti was overcooked and very, very oily. Tomatoes were orange instead of red and with the lack of taste you get with bog standard supermarket tomatoes. The cheese was of indeterminate type, the green ingredients were notable by their absence.

What a shame, it would be a great place to take visitors but I really wouldn't offer them food like that.

Then there was a surprise when the bill arrived. In tax free Dubai there was a 10% "DM Fee", which I assume means Dubai Municipality.

An old Dubai evening.

As I said yesterday, we had a good evening in Satwa on Saturday, enjoying Dubai as it used to be.

There are two new baby girls amongst my in-laws and, as we're going to see them in a couple of weeks, Mrs Seabee decided we should buy them some gold.

Forget the famous gold souk these days, it's turned into a tourist attraction selling the same kind of bland jewellery they can find back home, it's just a bit cheaper here. The real Dubai gold shops are in the traditional areas these days, such as Satwa.

In the cluster tradition, being used now on massive scale with developments like Academic City, Healthcare City, Internet City, Media City and all the others, twenty or thirty little gold shops have set up side by side in what's really a mini gold souk.

So, a warm, humid evening, small shops crowded together, traffic in narrow streets, footpath crowded with people, the call to prayer starting...

The final piece of the jigsaw is the smell of all kinds of cooking on the heavy air...it looks, feels, sounds, smells like the real Dubai.

Then the shopping. Not the modern malls but how it used to be - into a gold shop, looking, weighing, haggling, on to the next...

...and eventually we get the right gift at the right price.

Then it's into one of the wonderful perfume, herb, all-sorts shops to buy some frankinsence...





And to round the evening off, a meal in our favourite Thai restaurant, Ruan Thai in Al Diyafah Street.

It ain't one of yer posh, upmarket, pretentious and outrageously expensive restaurants of the type many European expats seem to think it's necessary to waste their money in.





But the inside is well enough fitted out, it's clean, comfortable and you get excellent, friendly service...






The special bit that we particularly enjoy is the complimentary appetiser:




Clockwise from top left, all chopped into tiny pieces, hot red chilli, fresh ginger, lemon, onion, with roasted grated coconut and salted peanuts.

Spread some of the sweet chilli sauce on a leaf, pop on a small portion from each dish (be easy with the chilli, it's hot), wrap it up and enjoy an explosion of flavours.

Then we had chicken with chilli & basil, mixed vegetables...



...vegetable fried rice, jungle curry with chicken...




All this plus a large bottle of mineral water and the bill was Dh94*

I managed to resist a stroll across the road to Baskin Robbins ice cream, a highly unusual demonstration of self-denial.

If you're missing the old Dubai, or you never experienced it, I recommend you spend an evening in Satwa.


*Dh 94 is about US$25, £12.70, €16.

Government says 'no' to Hooters.

A week ago I said that , regardless of what we think, the government of Dubai would decide whether 'Hooters' restaurants would open in Dubai. That posting is here.

A report in Al Khaleej is picked up by Gulf News in which it says that Ali Ebrahim, deputy director-general for executive affairs at the Department of Economic Development, confirms that 'Hooters' has not even been registered with them. That supports my suggestion that it was a fishing trip by the Kuwaiti franchise owner to gauge reaction before he invested any money.

Mr Ebrahim also confirmed what we all know, that anything in violation of the religion, traditions & culture of the UAE are not permitted.

Gulf News story is here.

To hoot or not to hoot.

Reports say that 'Hooters' is opening in Dubai.

My feeling is that this is a fishing trip. The Kuwaiti franchise owner is "...trying to secure a location to open..." and I think he's floating the idea publicly to see what the reaction is. (Much like the ludicrous 'Emirati-in-national-dress' building design, that it transpired had not even been submitted for planning approval).

I'm deeply suspicious of a restaurant that promotes itself not on its food/price/ambience/service combination but on the chest measurement of its female staff. As a result I've never bothered to eat in one of the many 'Hooters' I've seen overseas. If they do open in Dubai I won't be a customer.

I also believe there's a 'time & place' for everything. A leisurely drink in a bar or a social evening in a pub doesn't require topless barmaids, as I've seen in Hong Kong and the UK. If anything it spoils the evening.

Likewise, scantily clad females on the beach or around the pool are fine with me - but not in a shopping mall. And not just here either. I'm not talking about Muslim sensibilities, I'm talking about what's appropriate, and what I see too many western women wearing in Mall of the Emirates would offend me equally in an Australian mall.

So I would hate to see 'Hooters' open here. However...

Back in about 1978 I remember a conversation with friends. A Brit commented that we shouldn't be drinking alcohol in a Muslim country, that it was wrong. An Emirati friend replied that it was his government that made the laws and if they said it was OK, then it was OK.

The same applies to 'Hooters'. The government of Dubai will decide what's acceptable and what's not. If they give the approval to 'Hooters' I guess we should all stop complaining.

If we don't like it we can always leave!

Never mind the name, go for the food.

I've been intending for ages to talk about and recommend some of the restaurants where we've had excellent meals at amazingly low prices. But other things keep cropping up and I haven't got around to it.

That is until I read Moryarti's review of Al Sammach which prompted me to stop making excuses and just get on and start doing the reviews.

Far too many western expats will only go to restaurants in 5-star hotels, wouldn't be seen dead in the mall or roadside restaurants. The lack of alcohol is part of it I'm sure. But I enjoy a drink as much as anyone and I can tell you that alcohol is not actually essential to having a good evening, excellent dinner and enjoying yourself.

The restaurant I'll talk about this time is Automatic in Jumeirah 1. Not the best choice of name I grant you, but ignore that. It's a small chain of Lebanese restaurants, been around for years and years, with outlets dotted around the city. We go to this particular one because it's the nearest to us.

It's in the Jumeirah Beach Centre on Beach Road, not far from Mercato Mall, on the ground floor at the front. (Get a window table and watch the cabaret of the morons using Beach Road as a racetrack.)

The decor & furnishings are predictable, just what you'd expect. Nothing frantically trendy, as too many of out outlets are, but comfortable. The staff are what you want them to be - greeted by the maitre de who will show you to your table, attentive service but not in yer face hovering all the time.

When you sit down your waiter will bring a huge bowl of salad, a big dish of assorted olives & pickles, a basket of bread, all of which is complimentary. The salad alone is enough for a meal - our last one was a whole lettuce, rocket, two cucumbers, a whole green capsicum, tomatoes, carrots, radishes, spring onions, bunches of mint & a whole lemon.


Most of this is free folks!

It's typical Lebanese cuisine, which I must say is one of my favourites. Not complicated, just good quality fresh ingredients cooked simply. And plenty of different mezza dishes - we love to pick at the different tastes and textures of a variety of dishes.

Of the main courses our favourites are Shish Tawouk, marinated chicken pieces grilled on a skewer and served with rice or french fries, and Seafood Grill, which is hammour, large prawns & calamari with french fries & vegetables. We always have hommos, which I like with the kebab.

There's no alcohol of course but don't let that put you off. I recommend fresh lemon & mint juice, which Automatic does very well. They also have very fresh bread...



So our meal is often olives, pickles, salad, hommos, bread, shish tawouk, seafood grill, lemon & mint juice, mineral water, Turkish Coffee. And that doesn't cost much more than Dh100 in total. That's roughly 15 pounds Sterling, US$27, Aussie$36...for dinner for two.

Think about it folks. Dubai expensive? There's a hell of a lot here that isn't anywhere near as expensive as 'back home' - and making it even better value, here you're paying for it with untaxed salary.

Ridiculous & pretentious

Another ridiculous presentation from a five star restaurant.

Pax Romana at Dusit Dubai. An excellent, stylish restaurant. Decor, furnishings, food, staff, views, all are excellent.

The menu though! Designed by someone with no thought about its use or users. And obviously approved and accepted by the management.

A cumbersome heavy thing, like a child's first book, printed on very thick card. But worse than that, it's not a menu, a bill of fare, it's an abstract design project. The sort of thing you get from first year design students.

Design for the sake of it. Bits and pieces all over the place. Sideways and upside down even.

Think I'm exaggerating? Here's a photo of a page:

Preposterous pretentious presentation.

Had dinner yesterday at Sketch in the Metropolitan Palace Hotel in Deira.

I ordered Beef Fillet, which was served with vegetables, potato wedges and an interesting-sounding chilli chocolate sauce.

Here's what it looked like...



The pretentious presentation is preposterous, but so many restaurants do it that way.

A message to chefs. You are spoiling the food. STOP IT!

Why do chefs, who supposedly understand food, stack the meat on top of potato wedges or other vegetables? How on earth can a chef worthy of the title do such a thing? Hot meat or fish on top of vegetables steams them and turns them soggy. It's basic common sense, a basic understanding of cookery.

And the vegetables, just look at them. Stupid tiny pieces less than one centimetre square.

The beef was excellent quality and cooked exactly as I ordered it. The chilli chocolate sauce had far too much sugar and not enough chilli for my taste, but overall the ingredients and cooking were excellent.

The problem was the stupid, stupid, stupid presentation.