Toll roads questions.

The newly announced tollways are, and I quote, "part of wide reaching plans to ease traffic congestion in Dubai."

Oh really.

Phase one will be Sheikh Zayed Road/Garhoud Road in both directions.

That's both directions.

No mention of peak traffic. From Sharjah to Dubai a.m. and back again p.m. Go against the peak flow and the road is far from jammed. Starting at Media City at 8am you'll be in Deira in about 35 minutes. How will the toll ease traffic congestion for traffic going against the flow? There isn't any congestion.

No mention of timings. The assumption must therefore be that it will operate day and night seven days a week.

That's 24/7.

No mention of shutting off the sensors overnight, or at weekends. How will the toll ease traffic congestion for those of us using the roads overnight and at weekends? There isn't any congestion.

It's becoming very obvious that what the 'planners' (pause for hysterical laughter) do is to scour the world for things that other countries have and decide we must have them here too. It's beyond their ability to work out whether it fits in with the master plan, fits in with the other one-offs they've imported, works in this environment, is actually any bloody use whatsoever. They simply must have it so they add it to their increasing catalogue of mistakes.

Just look at what they're doing. The roads are confusingly dangerous in large part because they're a hybrid of US and British systems - dual-carriageways with U-turns plus roundabouts with traffic lights on them. We had to import both systems. As I posted last month, a tram system has been announced. Trams! That'll add more mayhem, confusion and congestion to the roads.

What else don't we have? Oh, I know! A toll system. Let's put one of those in too, that'll ease traffic congestion.

Dubai would work better if The Big Boss issued a decree banning planners.

N - U - C - L - E - A - R

The word is 'nuclear'.

It's pronounciation is 'nuclear'.

The technology may be complicated and beyond the wit of most of us but not the word, surely!

But it is, it seems, beyond the linguistic skills of the majority of announcers, newsreaders and presenters on Dubai's radio stations.

Why do they say "nookyoolar"?

Look at the word! How do you get 'nookyoolar' out of that sequence of letters?

It's driving me crazy - I know, I need to get out more, but it's just one of those things that really gets under my skin.

What with North Korea and Iran having ambitions in the nuclear department, and the Arab world now also considering nuclear power for desalination plants and whatnot, the word - or rather the non-word, the mis-pronounced word, the teeth-gratingly annoyingly mispronounced word - is popping up with relentless regularity.

It is not 'nookyoolar'. It is 'nuclear'.

Please, please, please, someone, anyone, STOP THEM.

Lost in translation?

It happens all the time. A press report quoting officials that leaves me bewildered.

I've mused in earlier posts - is it a language problem?

Does the official say words that don't quite come out as what he means? Or does he mean exactly what he says? Has the reporter mis-heard, misunderstood, misquoted?

Front page of Emirates Today is another classic example, in the story about 'beach pests'.

Protection of females using the beaches is vital on a number of levels. To see action being taken against the hordes of men harassing, photographing, propositioning them is excellent news.

The story is based around a conversation with the Director of Dubai Police CID, who explains what action is being taken.

Amongst it we get on to confusing stuff.

For example, he is quoted as saying that his department is prepared to arrest every man who goes to the beach for the sole purpose of staring at female swimmers.

Hmmm...difficult to prove I would have thought, and they're not likely to admit to that. More likely they'll say they were just taking the sea air, getting some exercise, meeting with their friends - just as the rest of us do. Some of them will be doing just that too I would have thought.

Then the quote that I really don't understand: "Those who go to the beach must swim. They are not allowed to sit and watch the swimmers...On the beach, they must swim or else they will be arrested."

Most of us who go to the beach spend more time sitting on the beach than we do in the water. Most of us look around at other beach-users, watch the people in the water.

That isn't the problem at all.

The actual problem is well-documented - groups of men invading females' personal space, both on the beach and in the water (but that's OK because the men are swimming?); illegally photographing them without their permission; making unwelcome advances; propositioning them.

It's good news that the issue is being addressed, but if the quotes are correct the way it's being planned is simplistic in the extreme and leaves a lot to be desired.

The full story is at Emirates Today

The Big Boss is at them again!

A few days ago I posted about Sheikh Mohammed bin Rashid losing patience and taking a strong line with the traffic authorities about the continuing traffic chaos in Dubai. We saw evidence of changes the very next day.

Now he's turned his attention to the Labour Law, the changes needed and the ways it's violated. "Unjust treatment will not be tolerated", he said. He's obviously studied the problem and come up with a whole raft of instructions to the ministers involved.

Sheikh Mohammed said the rights of expatriate workers must be protected, their living and working conditions - standards of health, safety and quality of life - are to be significantly improved. He instructed that an effective mechanism to ensure unpaid workers receive their dues and to enable legal job-changing is to be implemented. He said a medical insurance scheme is to be set up, covering all grades of labourers to provide them with the same level of healthcare as the rest of the community.

He instructed the Ministry to implement special contracts between maids & servants and their employers that limit working hours and give full rights. He ordered the setting up of a special court to deal with labour disputes and mistreatment cases. And he ordered the establishment of a 2,000 strong inspection unit to monitor workplaces and labour accommodation.

As if all that wasn't enough he also ordered an urgent investigation into the roles and capabilities of labour supply companies, with special focus on abuses of rights in lieu of providing job opportunities.

These things have been discussed here on blogs, and in some of the more adventurous newspapers, for some time. Changes to the law, and implementation of the law, were obviously overdue.

But as with the traffic problem I have to ask why necessary actions don't happen until Sheikh Mohammed becomes personally involved. It seems nothing happens until he identifies the problems, comes up with solutions and issues orders to the authorities and ministers.

When all else fails...

...execute the dictator.

Please read River's latest posting on her blog Baghdad Burning.

The Best War Ever

This is worth having a look at. Turn your speakers on.

If you go to the page it's also worth clicking on 'Read an exclusive excerpt from the book'.

Truth in advertising.

For several days now the papers have been carrying ads from developers bragging about winning one of the CNBC Property Awards.

It's a concentration that highlights something that’s really annoyed me for a long time - the way that artists' impressions depict the location and surroundings of planned buildings. These renders are used extensively in promotional sales material when the apartments are sold off the plan.

Dubai Marina is a good example, where tower after tower has been depicted by developers as having no other buildings around it, just landscaped gardens or parkland. And of course, they’re all absolute waterfront.

Here’s an ad from Gulf News, which incorporates a previous press release, “Promise Delivered”, about the Waterfront tower.



Here’s the artist’s impression. The name is ‘Waterfront’, the depiction is absolute waterfront.




And here are a couple of photographs I shot yesterday…



Yes folks, the building second from left is ‘Waterfront’ tower. Between it and the water is a wide pathway a large building plot and a road.

This isn't anything exceptional, it's the absolute norm for developers here.